Gents Journey
Gents Journey
Transforming Self-Doubt into Confidence: A Journey to Personal Growth
Unlock the secrets to overcoming self-doubt and building unwavering confidence with actionable insights from the Gentleman's Journey podcast. What if you could transform self-doubt into a powerful motivator rather than a hindrance? This episode promises to guide you through understanding the origins of self-doubt, such as past failures and fear of judgment, and offers five practical steps to manage it effectively. By recognizing self-doubt as a signal rather than a stop sign, you’ll be empowered to silence your inner critic and stride confidently toward your personal goals.
Explore the magic of consistent action and how small wins can lead to big transformations. Discover how setting micro-goals, like waking up with your alarm or reading a few pages daily, can create a positive momentum that reshapes your mindset. We highlight the value of surrounding yourself with positivity and reducing exposure to negativity—particularly in the digital space. By viewing failure as feedback rather than a finality, this episode encourages you to embrace an action-oriented life where growth prevails. Stay connected with us through texts, emails, or Instagram messages, and remember that you have the power to create your reality. I'm here to support you every step of the way.
"True mastery is found in the details. The way you handle the little things defines the way you handle everything."
Hello and welcome to the Gentleman's Journey podcast. My name is Anthony, your host, and today we're going to talk about something that it's really a killer of your progress. It's something that'll cloud your vision and it's something that will really hold you back from who you are. Now, what is this that I'm talking about today? I'm talking about self-doubt. So let's go ahead and let's talk about it. Self-doubt, so let's go ahead and let's talk about it.
Speaker 1:You know, self-doubt is something that we all deal with on a daily basis. I don't care how long you've been doing personal development, I don't care how strong your will is, I don't care how clear your vision is. Everybody, in some way, shape or form, deals with self-doubt. Self-doubt is just, it's one of those. I mean, in all honesty, it's one of the most powerful things that can really hold you back. But here's the truth it's not permanent and it's really honestly, it's not a reflection of your potential. Because I'm going to be honest with you guys. You know, doing this kind of stuff, you know, I myself face self-doubt sometimes. Sometimes I question if this podcast is going to be good enough. Is it going to be smart enough? Is it going to be clear enough? Am I going to be ready to take the next step into things, and it's okay to feel that. And if you're feeling that way right now, I want to tell you this. And if you're feeling that way right now, I want to tell you this You're not alone. But here's the great thing about this you have the power to shift from this, okay. So here's what we're going to do today. In today's episode, we're going to break down the roots of self-doubt, okay, but more importantly, I'm going to talk about how you can overcome self-doubt. Okay, but more importantly, I'm going to talk about how you can overcome self-doubt and, by the end of this, you are going to have the tools necessary to silence that inner critic and really start making huge steps towards your goals, because, remember, making huge steps towards your goals, because, remember, this is the time that you are going to make things happen, right? That's why you're listening to this podcast every day, right, monday through Friday, so you can be moving forward towards the person you want to be, okay.
Speaker 1:So, as we're talking about this, right? So, as we're talking about this, right, some of the root causes for self-doubt it looks like this it could be like past failures or mistakes. So, if you're always living in the past and you think about things that you've done. You're thinking about mistakes that you've made, you think about how this didn't work or how that didn't work. That's a cause for self-doubt.
Speaker 1:I would say the biggest thing that causes self-doubt is judgment and fear of judgment or fear of comparison, right? Well, I'm not going to be as good as so-and-so or so-and-so. Does this so much better than me? Or how can I be this? Right, they call something called imposter syndrome, where you know, they call it fake it till you make it. But, like, if you feel like you're an imposter doing something, self-doubt lives in these things, just lives in them, right? Because you don't have the confidence yet to push through. So your root causes are going to be your past failures or mistakes you've made. Right, it's going to be the judgment that you are putting on yourself, not anybody else. You're putting the judgment on yourself or you're comparing yourself to other people, right?
Speaker 1:They say comparison or comparison. Wow, that's a word. Comparing is the thief of joy. Don't compare yourself to anybody else. We're all in our own journeys and we're doing it the way that we are supposed to. Okay, you're on your own journey, so don't compare yourself to anybody else, right?
Speaker 1:So, as we're talking about this, right, as we're talking about self-doubt, I'm going to tell you right now and this is anybody, anybody, any sports star, any Hollywood actor or actress, anybody that has made it massive guess what they all have experienced or are currently experiencing self-doubt they just are self-doubt, they just are. Unfortunately, it's a part of the human experience is to experience self-doubt. But here's the thing, when we're talking about this, one thing I need you to understand it's not about eliminating the doubt, right. It's not about eliminating, like, how can I eliminate this doubt? What we're really trying to do here, we're trying to have doubt, not steer us, not overwhelm us, not having it, take the wheel and then steering us into a position or a situation in our own minds of something that's not going to be beneficial to us. Because that's what doubt does you have? To remember that self-doubt is a signal, it's not a stop sign. Okay, remember that All self-doubt is is just your inner self telling you or, let's say, the person you're trying to become, that old person is saying that you're not good enough, it's not gonna work, all it is is just trying to hold you back, right?
Speaker 1:So let's now talk about this new person. You're gonna become right, and let's give you five steps to overcome self-doubt. Okay, let's go ahead and do that Now. Step number one is you got to recognize and label the doubt. All right, now, I'm going to take a drink here really quick. I'm talking a lot today, today.
Speaker 1:So, as we're recognizing this right, awareness of your self-doubt weakens its hold. Because here's the thing, what people don't understand self-doubt can creep up on you. It can be like that silent partner that you have no idea existed, and then it pops up at the worst time, or it's always whispering in the back like you're not good enough, this isn't going to work. Don't you remember from before how this didn't work? Blah, blah, blah. Right, that is your inability to recognize it. It'll show up as a feeling, it'll show up as anxiety, it'll show up as these things. That's trying to tell you that you're not good enough. But it's your job to push through this right. Because here's the thing when I feel that here's exactly what I this is the process I do when I feel that I pause and I ask myself what story am I telling myself right now?
Speaker 1:And I stop and I think I'm like okay, am I telling myself I'm not good enough? Of course I'm good enough. Am I telling myself I'm not smart enough? Well, you know, if I'm not smart enough, I will figure out a way to make this work. You know, am I judging myself for this? Do I feel like other people are judging me for it? Well, you know what they're going to judge me. That's fine, that's on them, that's not on me.
Speaker 1:Right, when you do this, when you start to name the doubt that you have, by making that statement like, what story are you telling yourself right now, you remove the power of the doubt from you. I'll say that again when you identify it and you say to yourself what story am I telling myself right now? What am I telling myself right now? When you name the doubt, it removes its power from you. It's kind of like all bullies Once you punch them in the mouth, they go away. Self-doubt is one of your biggest bullies that you will always go up against, but the more that you punch it in the mouth, the quieter its voice gets, the more it doesn't bother you. It just doesn't.
Speaker 1:Now step two you have to reframe your negative thoughts. Right, when people say like oh my gosh, I'm not ready, I'm not ready, I can't do this, oh my gosh, I can't do this. Instead of saying that, right, take a deep breath and go. You know what I'm learning and I'm growing, so think about how that sounds. Like I'm not ready, oh gosh, to taking a breath. I'm learning and I'm growing. You know, and this is the second thing, you do Use what if? Scenarios. Most of us don't know how to use what if the right way. A lot of us use like what if I fail? What if this doesn't work? What if they do this? All negative, instead of shifting our focus into an abundance mindset and say what happens if I succeed? What if this works? What if I get this? What next?
Speaker 1:If you remember what I was saying before, people are actually afraid to succeed than they are to fail. When you start to reframe your mind and you get used to success because that's what all you see in your mind self-doubt can't live in a mind that is clear, concise, focused and it's always telling itself a positive story. It can't live in there and it has the ability to always reshape itself, reshape its thinking right. Because here's one thing that I do when that happens right? I write down my self-doubt and then what I do. I rewrite that self-doubt in a positive frame. What if this does work? What happens then?
Speaker 1:When you start to really reframe your mind on how you see things, like I'm saying, not only can doubt not live in there, right, but when you start to have this positivity and you start to have this focus and abundance mindset I'm telling you right now you do that your whole world changes, because your world is malleable by how you think, what you intend and how you act. If you're always doubting yourself, the world is going to doubt you. The minute you stop doubting yourself, the world will not doubt you, just won't. The next thing build a track record of wins. Self-doubt thrives and I mean thrives in uncertainty.
Speaker 1:Prove it wrong with small and consistent wins Like I can give an example self-doubt's like you're not gonna get up at 4.30 tomorrow morning. You're not going to get up at 4. You set your alarm right and then you put your phone across the room and as soon as it starts to make its noise, you get up out of bed and bam, you know what that is. That's a win. That is one checkmark against self-doubt. And you start doing that, you start setting these little things and you start. Remember that momentum. Momentum carries you through everything, I promise, right, when you're starting with what they call micro-goals.
Speaker 1:Micro-goals could be like you know we talked about when you're starting your goals, right? Remember, just instead of reading like you know we talked about when you're starting your goals, right? Remember, just instead of reading, like you know, a book a month, you start to maybe read three to four pages a day. Those are, that could be a micro goal. You know, your micro goal is like I want to get up five minutes before my alarm. Right? My micro goal is I'm going to sit and take two minutes for myself right now and just think positive. That could be a micro goal, right? Micro goals, what they really do is that they're always shifting your pattern of thinking. That's really what they do, right? Because here's the thing I'm going to tell you right now One step today is way, way, way better than waiting for perfect conditions.
Speaker 1:Micro goals will get you there. It'll cause. It forces action, right? You're like, if you feel like, oh, I'm going to wait 10 minutes, just do it now. Doing it now, in 10 minutes from now, makes no difference, just do it now.
Speaker 1:Okay, now, here's the thing too. I think that a lot of people forget. A lot of people forget about their past achievements. You've done hard things before and you can do this Because here's the thing all the worst days you've ever had in your life so far you've survived. Think about that. All the worst days of your life that you've had so far you have survived. Because you're listening. Right now, give yourself more credit.
Speaker 1:Okay, now here's probably the second biggest thing about overcoming this. Surround yourself with supportive people. I'm going to tell you right now this is the biggest thing. If you surround yourself with people who are constantly pointing you down or not giving you support or saying things that are not true about you in a negative connotation, those are not people you need to have in your life and, unfortunately for a lot of us, that could be our family. I'm not saying you should cut them off completely, but surround yourself with people that are supportive. Yourself with people that are supportive. There's a lot of online groups that are positive. Right, if you want to text me or you want to email me or you want to DM me on Instagram, I'll be your positive support. I don't care. This is your year and we cannot waste it with negative people trying to bring you down. That's not what's going to happen this year, okay, so build yourself a circle of people that believe in you.
Speaker 1:Okay, limit yourself to exposure of negativity and comparison. I'm going to tell you right now and this might be an unpopular opinion to you Instagram is not real. Instagram is not real. Facebook is not real. Twitter is definitely not real, right, tiktok is not real. All those things right now are just very small, very produced snippets of people's lives. Right, that we're trying to show you perfection, but guess what? Nobody is perfect, okay, so, please, please, please, stop comparing yourself to them and really, more honestly, just don't be on social media as much. Limit yourself to that exposure. You will. There is so much stuff out there about how social media can ruin your life, like on a mental plane. Just don't be on it as much. Okay, I know it's addicting, I get it, but it'll be beneficial, I promise.
Speaker 1:Okay, because here's the thing you have to realize what you consume, what you say and what you do influences your mindset more than you realize, and I'm talking about your environment. If you have negative people and you're listening to negative things and all you're seeing are negative things, you will become negative. It's just what it is. So surround yourself with positivity. Listen to positive things, watch positive things. Don't watch the news. I'm sorry I don't watch the news, I just don't because you know what a lot of it's not going to matter unless you're watching the weather. That's really one of the only things that's going to really directly affect you.
Speaker 1:Okay, now here's the next thing. Take an imperfect action. Just take some kind of action. Okay, clarity comes from action, not overthinking. When you start taking more and more action, guess what happens? Doubt can't creep in, just can't. You start taking action. The more action you take, the less time you have to doubt yourself. Remember that, okay, because here's the thing when you take action, you're not overthinking. How many times have you known people that have completely and this could be you, I don't know that completely overblow a situation in their mind and now they're in this frantic mindset and now they can't even accomplish what they were supposed to do because they completely overthought it. Overthinking takes away everything from you, okay, so don't do it, because you want to crush doubt. You know what? The biggest thing that crushes doubt Momentum, and momentum is something that comes from one action at a time. Now here's the next thing.
Speaker 1:Embrace failure as a part of growth. Shift what you see failure as. See it as feedback, not as finality, something I tell people all the time there is never anything. How can I say this the right way? There is never anything. How can I say this the right way? Everything you've done in your life is what's got you to this point. Right, but there's never anything you've done wrong. There's only lessons that you've learned. Okay, there's never wrong decisions. Okay, there's never wrong decisions. There's only things that you're learning from. Okay.
Speaker 1:Now, here's the thing. You know you could bring up people that have failed. You know you could talk about the Starbucks guy. He went over like what was it? 300 investors. Everyone said no. You know. If you look at Oprah Winfrey, you know you look at her first shows, they were like trash TV. You know. Now she has her own network and she's a billionaire. You know. You look at the Rock, you know he was literally sleeping on a dirty mattress. He found in a trash can. He had six bucks to his name. Now he's in every movie in the world.
Speaker 1:You know everyone has a starting point right, because they realize that there is no such thing as failure. There's only lessons. That's the thing. You haven't failed. You've learned how to not do it that way. You know what I mean. So think about that for a second. You're not failing. You're only learning how to do things the right way. You're honing in your process of what it is that you got to do. All right, but that process and that honing process cannot happen without you taking action. You have to take action for that. Okay. Now here's the next thing.
Speaker 1:One of the biggest things that happens when you start to crush doubt or overcome your self-doubt is confidence. Confidence is what gets you in the door. It's what gets you the appointment. It's what gets you the date. It's what gets you the partner that you're looking for. It's what gets you the job that you're looking for. Everything evolves. Confidence. It evolves around that right, because how are you going to want to talk to someone? Or are you going to talk like hey, my name is Anthony Nice to meet you? Look them in the eyes, shake their hand? That means something. Confidence is what's going to carry you through, and what's going to get you confident is taking concise action all the time when you feel doubt. That's when you should be taking action Absolutely.
Speaker 1:Because here's the thing Confidence creates opportunities. If you're confident and you're in a relationship, it makes your relationship stronger. If you want to start leading people, you got to be confident in yourself, because they will follow you. If you're in a relationship, it makes your relationship stronger. If you want to start leading people, you got to be confident in yourself, because they will follow you if you're confident, because here's the thing you have to understand. Please understand this Doubt is temporary, but confidence built through action that lasts a lifetime. I'll say that again Doubt is temporary, but confidence built through action that lasts a lifetime.
Speaker 1:Okay, so this week, I'm going to challenge you. I'm going to challenge you. I'm going to challenge you today. Okay, when self-doubt starts to show up, I want you to name it, I want you to reframe it and then I want you to take one bold action. Anyways, let's say you're single and you see a pretty girl. Go up and talk to her. Or a pretty guy Same thing, right.
Speaker 1:If you're worried about something, take action towards it. Don't live in your mind. Live in action. Okay, because here's the thing Growth starts the moment you decide to stop listening to the voice in your head that says that you can't. Okay, because I'm going to tell you I'm going to leave it like this. Your doubt is a visitor. You get to decide how long it stays in your life, okay, so again, don't let doubt rule your mind. You can do this this 2025, claim it right now. This is your year. All right, I'm claiming it as my year. Claim it as your year as well.
Speaker 1:So again, guys, thank you, so, so, so, very much for listening today. So, so, very much for listening today. You know, if you have any questions on this or anything I talk about, please, please, please, never hesitate to reach out to me. There's three different ways. First way is you can text me. Right, it'll say, like you know, text me, or like text to chat or something like that. Right, you click on that, send me a message. I'll send you a message right back. Second way is going to be my email. My email address is anthonyatgentsjourneycom and, last but not least, you can find me on Instagram, mygentsjourney. Dm me there. I'll be more than happy to answer any questions or concerns of you about this or anything that I've talked about. Okay, so again, thank you so much for listening today. And remember this you create your reality, take care.